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Thursday, July 27, 2006

Top Ten Floyd Landis Excuses
  
"High altitude in the Alps made daddy dizzy"
"Who can resist Balco's delicious 'spicy chipotle' flavor
"I was trying to impress Sheryl Crow"
"Uh...global warming?"
"The world hates Americans already, so does this really matter?"
"French bastards must have dosed my quiche"
"Wanted to give 'New York Post' excuse to run hilarious 'Fink Floyd' headline"
"Hulk no need excuse"
"Frankly, I'd rather be a disgrace than a loser"
"Screw you - - I'm Floyd ***damn Landis"
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"Always wanted to be in French newspaper under headline 'Le Jackass'"

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"It's my dream to meet the ranking member of the Government Reform Committee"

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"Next you'll tell me my bike's electric motor is illegal"

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"Am I honestly supposed to know what's in every needle I inject in my ass?"

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"Had to redeem a BALCO gift certificate before it expired"

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"Shouldn't have drank from Barry Bonds' water bottle"

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"Thought 'steroids' was French for 'power bar'"

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